Once upon a time, a really dorky princess spent a day watching increasingly ridiculous stunt contouring videos.

Hammers. High heels. Knives. There was no limit to the totally bonkers things that people put on their faces in order to get cheekbones sharp enough to kill a man. It's a silly video trend, but it makes people laugh — and she always wants to make people laugh.

And then the princess had a brainwave: wine contouring. She sprang from her bed at 2 o'clock in the morning, wrote a script for a video poking fun at the silly things beauty gurus tell us to do to our faces, and filmed it the next day.

Here is that video. Hold onto your butts, because it's awesome.

The princess — I hope it surprises none of you that IT ME — was genuinely awed when the video went COMPLETELY CRAZY.

Not everyone gets satirical humor, but in this case, the world was on my side. Allure, HuffPo, and Cosmo all wrote about it, which was basically a dream come true.

I even got to go on the Today Show and teach Hoda and Kathie Lee my wine contouring ways.

wine contouring hoda kathie lee
photo: Revelist

You can watch the clip, in which I call Donald Trump out for being orange as hell, right here.

So if you ever second-guess yourself or the greatness of your ideas, remember that sometimes a crazy 2am brainwave and a $10 bottle of wine can change your life.

photo: Alle / Revelist

Cheers, everyone! May we all contour ourselves into eternal fleekness.

photo: Alle / Revelist