Thursday (August 25) is Tim Burton's birthday, and you know what that means — it's a great day! for being sad. But you know, in a cool goth kind of way.
Now, you could just throw on a movie marathon of all his classic works, like "Beetlejuice" or "Batman Returns," but where's the fun in that? Instead, we've put together an exhaustive guide for you to live your Tim Burton obsession to the fullest today. Here's how to celebrate the filmmaker in a way that he would really, truly appreciate:
First off, just let your hair do whatever it feels like today. You deserve it.
Make sure your foundation is as pale as humanly possible. Did you get a tan this summer? Fix it. Fix it right now.
Your outfit today should consist of black, white, red, and stripes, in any combination you feel to be appropriate.
It would also help if your clothing were vaguely Edwardian-inspired, although it’s not a requirement. Especially if you’re wearing enough black.
Try your best to look naive and quizzical, but also rebellious, at all times.
Unless you’re going less for the young protagonist vibe and more for an evil witch, in which case feel free to let loose.
Start a Spotify playlist that’s nothing but Danny Elfman theme music. Listen to it everywhere.
The soundtracks to “The Nightmare Before Christmas,” “The Corpse Bride,” “Edward Scissorhands” are required listening. You could also throw “Sweeney Todd” in there too, but trust me, the original Broadway recording is much better.
Follow it up with some Harry Belafonte.
Listen, if Belafonte tells you to jump in the line, you do it.
Shop at Hot Topic.
You don’t have to buy anything, but at the very least checking out their Band T-shirts section will get you in the right frame of mind for the day.
Read the books that many of his movies are inspired by.
"Alice's Adventures in Wonderland," "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," "James and the Giant Peach," and "Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children" all make for a pretty stocked book shelf.
Or, try reading one of Tim Burton's books!
They're like if Shel Silverstein and Edward Gorey were fused together in a horrific lab accident and then put out a book of illustrated poems.
Watch "Ed Wood," which is hands down his best movie.
If you know anything about movie history, then you know Ed Woods is basically a punchline — he’s often referred to as the worst director of all time for his work on terrible schlocky B-movies like “Plan 9 From Outer Space.” But Burton’s movie will seriously make you love and root for him.
Also watch "Pee-Wee's Big Adventure," which is his other best movie.
Is the sight of Johnny Depp's face stressful to you right now, in light of recent events? Don't worry, because unlike that jerk with all the hats, Pee-Wee Herman is a nice boy who will never hurt you. This was Burton's full-length debut, and it still holds up as one of his most beloved films for a reason.
Bring something back from the dead. Your dog, a wife, anybody. Doesn’t matter.
Hooray for defying nature!
Get lost in the woods.
Maybe you'll find the Easter Bunny!
Watch an episode of "Dark Shadows."
Prior to being an oddly comedic Tim Burton movie, did you know that "Dark Shadows" was a ridiculous late '60s soap opera that produced 1,225 episodes in just five seasons? Today it still has a huge cult following.
Go to Beetle House, the Tim Burton inspired bar.
An East Village restaurant where it's Halloween all year long. Just be warned — if you want food, you'll have to make a reservation ahead of time. They're even having a costume party for Tim Burton's birthday, although it might be too busy at this point.
Try to create your own Big Eyes painting.
Just as long as you don't pass it off as your own idea. Otherwise Margaret Keane will totally sue the pants off of you.
Say "Beetlejuice" three times, just to see what'll happen.
Probably nothing, right? go on, try it. What could go wrong.
Buy a giant Oodie Boogie decoration and carry it around with you like it's your best friend.
If you want you can fill it with bugs. I wouldn't recommend that, though.
Ponder a childhood tragedy that led you to become the person you are today.
Just really mull over those painful feelings for at least a few minutes.
Travel to beautiful Sleepy Hollow, New York.
Don't be let down if you find that it's just a nice town that isn't full of witches.
Watch "The Death Of Superman Lives: What Happened?"
In the '90s, Tim Burton was set to direct a film entitled "Superman Lives" starring Nic Cage as Superman and with a script by Kevin Smith. Obviously it never happened, and this documentary by Jon Shnepp explains why. Too bad, I would have paid good money to watch a version of "Batman v Superman" where Nic Cage and Michael Keaton go at it.
Go visit the MOMA's traveling "World of Tim Burton" exhibit.
Currently you will have to fly to Shanghai to do this, or wait until it comes back to America. Either way, it'll be a fun time!
Finally, just start drawing spirals everywhere, all the time.
Tim Burton would not have gotten to where he is today without spirals.