Your BFF is getting married, and she chose you to be her MOH. That, my friend, is a big deal. It means she trusts you to be her listening ear, her planning sidekick, and right hand woman during a pivotal point in her life. While there are tons of fun things ahead (can you say bachelorette par-tayyyy?!) there are tons of other responsibilities you’ll have, including organizing a bridal shower.
While you’ve probably attended many of these in your lifetime, hosting one is a whole other ball game. You can’t hang by the bar while the bride opens gifts. You can’t “sneak away” to text your mom about the god-awful thing Aunt Millie said. You have to be a present, gracious hostess — and do a lot of prep work to even get to that point.
Before you start feeling overwhelmed, try not to panic. We have 10 tips that will help you be the best MOH you can and host a fabulously fun bridal shower everyone will love.
Ask the bride what she wants and always put her first.
Listen, something happens to people when someone is about to walk down the aisle. Everyone that is close to the bride suddenly has very deep opinions on what should and shouldn’t happen at a wedding and all of its surrounding functions. The thing is, none of their opinions matter above the bride’s. Bride doesn’t want to be surprised? Don’t surprise her no matter how much it will “break her mother’s heart” if you don’t. Bride doesn’t want shower games? There will be no shower games. Ask her to give you a lists of dos and don’ts. From there you can pull together a great party with your own personal touches in her parameters so everyone is happy.
Establish a budget.
Yes, your BFF bride-to-be DOES deserve an event that is equal in scale to Blue Ivy’s fairy princess birthday party, but the truth is, you and all of your bridesmaids probably have very different coffers to offer. So be sure that you set limits, and also prepare to pay a little more as the MOH.
Make a timeline and stick to it.
This is an exciting time, but believe me when I say things will sneak up on you. Figure out dates for things early on, and plan around it. Set reminders for yourself so you know when deposits are due, invitations have to go out, and things need to be set up.
Make sure everyone is included.
As the MOH, you’re going to be the designated ringleader of this whole thing. That means it's up to you to orchestrate “meetings,” delegate tasks, and field everyone’s questions and concerns. With the exceptions of the bride’s opposition, prepare to include not only all of her bridesmaids in planning, but also her mother and mother-in-law if both are in the picture. Not only will it make them happy that they were included, they can be very helpful in gathering info on RSVP lists and sensitive family issues.
Pick a neutral location.
Weddings have a tendency to unleash the crazy and competitiveness in others, so choose a venue where the bride and her close friends and relatives will be comfortable. For example, hosting it at the mother-in-law’s house may ruffle the feathers of the bride’s mother or vise versa.
Send old fashioned invitations.
It may be tempting to send out a massive Facebook event invite, but a paper invitation is more personal and settles better with older family members. Make sure you include where the bride is registered or where to send gifts to her “honeyfund” and make sure you provide your contact information for RSVPs.
Pick a theme or a scheme
I know, I know. It sounds cheesy, but a theme helps everything. It makes food and décor decisions easier and it keeps everyone on track. If a theme isn’t her style, at least choose a color scheme to make all of the details flow.
DIY is your friend.
If you or a fellow maid are capable of handling a hot glue gun, you should definitely look into DIYing everything you can. Not only does it add a person touch, it helps you save cash for the bigger expenses.
Bring a notepad.
Getting presents is never a bad thing, but opening them in front of all of your relatives and friends can be really overwhelming. Plop down next to your bride-to-be during present time and help her make sense of it all by noting who gave her what to make her thank you cards easier to write.
Capture the memories.
Put yourself or a fellow bridesmaid in charge of getting photos of all of the guests, and try to come up with a creative guest book they can sign. The memorabilia will mean so much to your bride-to-be as this time in her life will go by super quickly!