Hopefully this won't shock you, but I don't wear color.

Call it the fashion girl uniform, but I stick to a wardrobe palette of black, white, and grey. You know, shades that befit my Goth Queen aesthetic. I've always rationalized this by saying that you have to really like yourself to wear all black: it's stark and dramatic, and there's nowhere to hide.

Or that's what I told myself.

Lately I've been wondering if that was really true. Am I happy in black, or do I only wear it because it's safe? After some soul-searching, I realized that I felt too visible when wearing color, so I avoided it because I don't want people looking at me.

That kind of fear is everything I tell you guys to fight against. So I did something about it.

I challenged myself to wear color for a solid week, and document my transformation from Morticia Addams to Rainbow Brite. Here's everything I wore — and everything that happened — when I tried living that multicolored monochrome life.


Monday: RED

black halo two piece
photo: Alle / Revelist

The last time I wore a red dress was to my seventh grade graduation — which was probably around the time I wore my last crop top. This two-piece dress from Black Halo ($350, Shopbop) made me VERY nervous when I put in on — but I quickly realized that I loved it. You can't hide when you wear red — especially not when you're rocking a skirt with such a dramatic slit — and even though I was scared about it, I ended up LOVING this look.

black halo red dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

The crop top is loose, and the back is longer than the front. It's basically perfect.

black sandals red dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

I don't own red shoes, so I wore this outfit with black sandals that I bought at DSW for like $30. You may be looking at this photo like "Damn, how is that skirt dragging on the ground with those shoes," and I WAS WONDERING THE SAME THING. I am 5'10, and I need to get this shortened so that it fits; tall babes, let Black Halo into your life. You will not regret it.

COLOR VERDICT: I am into wearing red. I look great in red. I may even like crop tops.

Tuesday: ORANGE

alle wearing orange
photo: Alle / Revelist

"I have never worn orange," I told my boyfriend as I put this dress on. Does it make me look like a pumpkin with my black hair?"

He assured me that I didn't, but I still felt like it.

This dress is from & Other Stories ($95), and it has a cool '70s vibe that I'm pretty into.

pocket dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

The best thing about it is that it has semi-pockets, which I like. They're not super-deep, but I can fit my phone in there.

70s shoes
photo: Alle / Revelist

I went even further down the Cool '70s Mom road with these studded mules, which again, I bought at DSW — they're by Coach, but I call them my Sexy Dalek Shoes.

orange dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

The weirdest thing about this look, aside from the fact that I felt like Halloween all day, was that it inspired PITCHED battles about what color it really was. To be fair, it does look really different depending on the light; so here I am, casually chilling on a very orange chair in our office to prove how O R A N G E it really is.

COLOR VERDICT: I'm not feeling orange. These shoes also gave me a blister. Pass.

Wednesday: YELLOW

yellow outfit
photo: Alle / Revelist

Like red, yellow is a color that demands attention. Unlike red, I do not think that yellow suits me; I've never felt more sallow and jaundiced in my life than in this outfit. Because I felt like a festive pineapple, I did my hair in a topknot to really hammer the comparison home.

The gold shoes, which are my favorite thing about this, are a discontinued style from J. Crew. The top is a t-shirt I bought at American Apparel so long ago that they no longer make this cut; the bottom is not only extremely abbreviated, but from Zara ($26). And just when you thought this outfit couldn't get weirder...

zara yellow shorts
photo: Alle / Revelist

BAM. This yellow skirt is actually MINI CULOTTES. What a world.

Wearing something THIS bright and THIS short all day really made me appreciate how good my legs look; suck on this, anyone who says women can't wear minis past age 30!

leg tattoos
photo: Alle / Revelist

And if there were any questions about whether or not I have tattoos, let them be forever answered now.

COLOR VERDICT: Eh. I can take or leave yellow. If I had to buy a yellow bridesmaid dress, I'd live, but I wouldn't do it voluntarily. I *do* think I look fly as hell in short-shorts, though.

Thursday: GREEN

alle green dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

I have green eyes, so I honestly thought this would be a no-brainer. NOT SO! Turns out that I look fucking ABYSMAL in most shades of green — and I know this, because I originally styled a completely different all-green outfit. Alas, I looked like soggy cabbage, so I abandoned it for this green dress.

So let's talk about it. This is a bridesmaids dress from J.Crew (Megan, $250), and I bought it because I had to. I was mega-broke at the time and was like, this is a tonne of money for something *this* green, but my friend was all, "Oh, you'll totally wear it again!"

This is the greatest lie the devil ever told. YOU WILL NEVER WEAR IT AGAIN, until you're forced to for a fashion experiment. Take it from me.

green dress jcrew
photo: Alle / Revelist

I like it fine, I guess? The back is pretty, the material is fun to twirl around in, and it looks good with my black hair. And formalwear in the office is always fun.

COLOR VERDICT: Yes to green eye makeup; no to green clothing. Apparently my coloring means that I have to be extremely particular about the shade of green I wear, and that's way too much work.

Friday: BLUE

5th and mercer dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

Yes.

Yes.

YES.

I love this color blue; I love this dress; I love how I feel in this outfit. It's by 5th and Mercer ($250, Shopbop) and I am obsessed with it. My only issue is that I wore this on a day that was 95 degrees, so I sweated my balls off. WORTH IT.

5th and mercer blue dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

I genuinely think that the best part of this dress is the long gold zip up the back, which I unzipped a little at the hem so that I could walk (I'm tall; I take big strides!).

Please also observe my ass. This dress is magical to make my butt look like that. For once I have no fruit to compare myself to in a disparaging fashion.

This dress was a game-changer.  People told me I looked like a First Lady. They stopped me in the street. It was nuts. But it took this dress for me to really realize that there's nothing virtuous or "cool" exactly about blending in — I was made to stand out.

5th and mercer dress
photo: Alle / Revelist

Like, seriously. This dress has turned my entire LIFE into a thirst trap.

sam edelman shoes
photo: Alle / Revelist

My shoes — which are super comfortable, btw — are Circus by Sam Edelman, and sadly, are no longer available. I just wanted to give you a better look, because I think they're so pretty.

COLOR VERDICT: Bury me in cobalt blue. That is all.

So at the end of a week, am I going to abandon my all-black wardrobe in favor of color?

Definitely not. While I see why people love wearing color so much, it was a headache for me — I had to think a LOT about what went with what outfit, how my hair would work, how my makeup would look along with it. Wearing black and white, I never have to think about that. I love the simplicity.

But this experiment did make me think about myself differently. I was forced to realize that a lot of the reasons I choose not to wear color are because I don't think it looks good on me — and it does! Sometimes! This monochrome experiment was a needed reminder for me to take more risks with my ~fashion game~

After all, I could have gone my entire life without realizing how great I look in this red crop top.

red crop top
photo: Alle / Revelist

And let's face it: that would have been a CRIME.