alicia vikander oscars 2016
photo: AFP / Getty

This is it, people — Academy Awards time. Whether you're a movie buff or a dedicated fashion and beauty watcher, tonight is the big night. The Oscars red carpet is the ultimate in glamour, the night that Hollywood brings ALL the sartorial drama... and we're covering it exhaustively, just for you. Check out the absolute best looks from the 2016 Oscars red carpet right here.

Jennifer Lawrence is fantastic. Which is why it's so sad that she was attacked by sea urchins from the legs up.

jennifer Lawrence oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

What a tragic way to go.

If you've been wondering whether Charlize Theron remains perfect, the answer is yes.

charlize theron oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

I need this dress for my life. I will wear it every day: to work, to the grocery store, to take my dog to the dog park. Anything. Please grant my prayers, Fashion Gods.

Amy Poehler is wearing literally what I wish I were wearing right now: a beautifully embroidered, elegant kaftan.

Amy Poehler oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

Let us all decide, as a nation, to embrace Golden Girls style on the red carpet in 2016. See you on the lanai, Amy.

NAOMI WATTS. IS. FLAWLESS.

naomi watts oscars 2016
photo: Jason Merritt / Getty

According to our image subscription, she was also doing shots on the carpet with her partner, Liev Schrieber. We want to party with you, Naomi.

Rachel McAdams joins Saoirse Ronan in Slytherin House.

rachel mcadams oscars 2016
photo: Jason Merritt / Getty

Tina Fey shuts it down in the richest purple possible, amazing hair, and my DREAM necklace.

tina fey oscars 2016
photo: Todd Williamson / Getty

Mindy Kaling looks like a damn queen in this dramatic black and cobalt dress.

mindy kaling oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson/Reuters

And YES to the contrasting clutch!

WHAT IN THE LAYER CAKE HALF-PANTS HELL IS THIS, LADY GAGA.

lady gaga oscars 2016
photo: Jason Merritt / Getty

Speechless.

Brie Larson has covered her skirt with undersea creatures AND I LIKE IT.

brie larson oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

Why the belt, girl?

BURY ME IN SAOIRSE RONAN'S DRESS.

Saoirse Ronan oscars 2016
photo: Jason Merrit / Getty

This is SUCH a change for her, and I am ALL IN. Sexy Slytherin vibes for daaaaaaays.

Kate Winslet is in costume as a sexy oil slick.

kate winslet oscars 2016
photo: Jason Merrit / Getty

How would we improve this, dear readers? I would make the neckline lower and more sweetheart-shaped, and perhaps make the train more dramatic.

QUEEN CATE BLANCHETT IS AMONG US. WE ARE NOT WORTHY.

cate blanchett oscars
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

I'm hearing a ~fashion girl rumor~ that the flowers on her gown could be made of feathers? Will keep you posted.

If you have to tug at it like that, Reese, it doesn't really fit.

reese witherspoon oscars 2016
photo: Todd Williamson / WireImage

A+ lipstick and head-styling, though.

Jennifer Garner is making this '80s-inspired, heavy black velvet dress look light as a damn feather.

jennifer garner oscars 2016
photo: Steve Granitz / WireImage

Pure class, this one.

Love this color on Alicia Vikander. Is that balloon hem a SMIDGE "I made this dress myself from the fitted sheet in the spare room," though?

alicia vikander oscars 2016
photo: Getty / Jason Merritt

Emily Blunt is wearing a dress that I myself owned in 1998.

emily blunt oscars 2016
photo: Todd Williamson / WireImage

My hair wasn't this incredible, however.

NO KERRY WASHINGTON WHAT ARE YOU DOING.

kerry washington oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

LEATHER BOOBPLATE HIP DIAGONALS WHAT.

Pretty obsessed with the bondage-inspired detailing on Julianne Moore's dress.

julianne moore oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

Her face is, as always, actually flawless.

Margot Robbie is all one color.

margot robbie oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

Hair. Complexion. Dress. All gold. Looking like an Oscar does not grant you one.

Jennifer Jason Leigh gives us Debbie from "The Addams Family Values" in this pastel number.

jennifer jason leigh oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

That is the highest compliment I can give, tbh.

Noted goddess Chrissy Teigen looks immaculate in this red floral masterpiece.

chrissy teigen oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

FASHION NEWSFLASH: Rooney Mara has achieved Peak Rooney Mara.

rooney mara oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

This is exactly what you'd wear if you were dressing up as Rooney for Halloween.

Show me the lie.

Priyanka Chopra made a dress out of her lace curtains on the way to the Oscars.

priyanka chopra oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

I think she is genuinely amazing; this feels so safe and boring on her.

Patricia Arquette should wear this deep ocean blue every day for the rest of her life, amen.

patricia Arquette oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

How mad do you think J.Lo is that Heidi Klum pulled this dress first?

heidi klum oscars 2016
photo: Todd Williamson / Getty

It is some measure of her beauty that she's kinda selling me on this Naked Lilac Fairy getup.

Olivia Munn stars in "The Great Oscars Pumpkin, Charlie Brown."

olivia munn oscars 2016
photo: Jeff Kravitz / Getty

Jokes aside, this dress is gorgeous — so clean and minimalist and striking. Paired with the stark hair, it's even better.

Sophie Turner is so "Birth of Venus" in this pale green number.

Sophie Turner oscars 2016
photo: Kevin Mazur / WireImage

The creative neckline is perfection.

Olivia Wilde's deep-cut white gown is making me think of punk-rock angels with this INCREDIBLE shoulder detailing.

olivia wilde oscars 2016
photo: Getty / Jason Merrit

Daisy Ridley is making me think of the most sophisticated "Great Gatsby"-themed party on the planet.

daisey Ridley oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

One thing is for sure: Sofia Vergara knows what look works for her, and she sticks to it.

sophia vergara oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

Honestly, if I looked that good in a fitted, jewel-toned, flared dress, I'd wear them all the time, too.

Whoopi Goldberg (with daughter Martin) is killing me softly with this elegant black number and incredible octopus-themed handpiece.

whoopi goldberg oscars 2016
photo: Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

RELEASE THE FASHION KRAKEN.

This sleek white dress with floral hip detailing is a dream on Giuliana Rancic.

giuliana rancic oscars 2016
photo: Ethan Miller / Getty

I'm sure this is some sort of sponsored thing, but I am NOT LOVING THAT RUBBER DIVER'S WATCH, GIULIANA.

Dorith Mous is serving up corseted Evil Queen glam, and I am INTO it.

dorith mous oscars 2016
photo: Ethan Miller / Getty

Question for the audience: WOULD I like this better if the bodice under the black lace was ALSO black, or would that be overkill?

Louise Roe's ruffled peach gown and severely parted hair are perfect with the boldness of a coral lip and cat eyes.

louise roe oscars 2016
photo: Ethan Miller / Getty