traveling alone

Adventure is NOT out there! :-O

photo: Flickr/drainrat

A very smart, red-shoed young lady once said, "there's no place like home," and goddamnit, she's right.

The world is an evil and scary place, and the excitement of adventure, exploration, and self-discovery is not outweighed by the perils of traveling alone... as a woman. 

Men can go right ahead but women, as we all know, are too fragile and weak for this kind of exertion. Here are 12 terrible, horrible, mind-bendingly awful things that happen to women who travel solo.

1

You'll get lost.

Nevermind that we've got inventions like Google Maps, Waze, or even regular old paper maps — there's no way you'll be able to find your way around a new place by yourself.

2

You'll miss technology.

A photo posted by IWentAnyway (@iwentanyway) on

You CAN'T go without Facebook for a few days!!! What will happen to your email?!?! How will the world survive without your Twitter updates??? Everybody panic!!!!

3

You'll starve.

American food is the only food, full stop.

4

You'll get murdered.

Everyone is out to get you and no one can be trusted. That old woman? Murderer. That baby in a stroller? Murderer. Those teenagers taking selfies? Double-murderers.

5

You'll get sick.

If you're not within walking distance of a hospital, you're not safe. Foreign air is unclean air. Who took my hand sanitizer?!?! *hyperventilates*

6

You'll have culture shock.

What IS this language? What ARE these religions? What IS this food? What ARE these buildings? Go back to bed and never come out.

7

You'll get raped.

You don't know how to keep yourself safe and make smart choices, and you're more at risk out there than you ever were in your home city, right?

8

You'll be lonely.

Tú sólamente hablas inglés, y no puedes viajar sin traductor, ¿verdad?

10

You'll be defenseless.

You have no self-defense skills, and as a woman you're too weak to fend off anyone who might mean you harm. Obviously.

11

You'll get homesick.

WAAAAAAHHHH, CAN'T ADULT!!!

12

You'll definitely regret it.

A photo posted by Megan (@misfit_pixel) on

Traveling alone is a god-awful experience and the worst thing you'll ever do for yourself.

Seriously, though. Traveling — especially alone — is an empowering and incredible journey (literally). Just be safe, do a little research beforehand, and get a sturdy backpack (and a selfie stick) and you'll never regret a moment.