If you're behind — like, really behind — on Riverdale this season, don't keep reading. I'm about to spoil like half of the season for you. Needless to say, a lot has happened. So much so, in fact, that it feels impossible for even the most hardcore fans to keep up with the drama. So... let's see...

As it stands now? Jughead is wrapped out in a full-on mission to kick his own mother out of town and completely expel her drugs from the town. He and his family, by the way, are living in the Cooper family's house; Alice Cooper sold it so she could live on-site at her cult's new headquarters, the former Sisters of Quiet Mercy. Betty Cooper is living with the Jones, and somehow that's allowed. It's also somehow totally normal that Jughead's dad, FP — a former gang leader who's been charged with aiding and abetting the murder of a teenage boy — is the sheriff.

Cheryl Blossom and Toni Topaz broke up after Tony landed a job running security for Veronica Lodge's secret, underground bar — did we mention it hosts illegal gambling for teens now? Because it does. This is all really happening. We are supposed to be taking this in stride. And that's not even the half of it.

As if all this weren't ludicrous enough, this week's episode only made everything worse regarding drugs, gangs, nefarious cult leaders, illegal teenage fight clubs, and a whole lot of parental drama. Watch the video below to get a recap on everything you might've missed and have your most burning questions answered.